I was going through my journal and just had to share this entry from four years ago.  I still remember my sweet little son’s words to me and they have given me strength time and time again…

Motherhood is simultaneously crazy hard and incredibly beautiful at the same time.  Sometimes you just don’t know if you want to laugh, cry, scream, pray, or all of the above.

Right now, Natalie (11 months old) is teething. She is sick with a miserable cough, a snotty faucet of a nose, and what I suspect is a double ear infection.  Despite my best efforts she has been sick for 10 days now, and she has been particularly cranky all day, poor thing. Tonight she was inconsolable for a couple hours.

With all the teens and husband gone to the Church for youth activities tonight, I was reminded what it was like years ago as a young mother.  Jenae (11 yrs), my deputy mom when all the older kids are gone, is kinda out of commission from a scooter accident the other day that bruised and scraped her up badly enough that she is barely hobbling around.  

That means I had Ethan (8) and Brigham (4) as my helpers.  Ethan was trying to help Jenae while I wrestled Natalie. No matter what I did, I couldn’t get her to stop crying, whimpering or screaming.  I was exhausted and out of ideas. I sat on the couch holding her, laid my head back and closed my eyes to pray, because I wanted to cry and scream myself.

No sooner had I started my prayer than I heard little Brigham next to me, saying in his sweet, small, pleading voice, “Mama… don’t give up!”  My eyes flew open to see his concerned face looking up at me, his brow furrowed.  

I was so taken aback that I giggled, and then he giggled, and then Natalie stopped whimpering to look at us both.  I hugged Brigham and told him I loved him and thanked him for being my sweet boy.  He had helped me reset, helped me laugh at the struggle of it all.  

I love it when my children teach me!  How grateful I am that God sent them to me.  Moments like this are worth all the struggle and overwhelm.  This is going to be my new mantra when I start to feel overwhelmed, “Mama… don’t give up!”

Art Credit: Le Petit Calin by William-Adolphe Bouguereau